Restart
I have always been afraid of my own shadow. It creeps me out whenever I have these terrible thoughts. Perhaps, it is the result of the traumas that I experienced growing up--the humiliation that I received from my foster mom, my peers, and other people whom I consider as "significant." I developed a slight inferiority complex growing up. To ease the pain, I turn to religion, mysticism, and literature. Moreover, I also turn to sex and hidden pleasures. I never had the chance to process completely the shadows that live in me. Not until I met "myself" at the crossroads. Now--July 30th, 2024--is a new "restart." I don't know how far I could process the pain and turn it into something beautiful and worthy of offering to God. So be it.